Advisory: I sort of choke and swallow hard before posting an article like this on the eye of paradox, in spite of the fact that I have a history of being rather candid about my experiences as a “transgendered” individual here and on deviantart. I know that many of these posts have the potential to hurt me,...

I am well acquainted with the depths of despair; that place where words hurt in every way and never more than when they give the faintest glimmer of the only thing that could possibly be worse than despair: Hope. Hope makes you drag yourself through the hell you’re trapped in when you’re so broken it’s a miracle you...

In the eternal moment, the past and the future are simply a matter of perspective and the past can be influenced by overlapping reinforcement or the intent of the resolving future. A time paradox is a self-informing sequence within a point. The classic grandfather paradox assumes that time is linear, ignoring the fact...

My eyes opened and this is what I saw. You can in yourself be anything you desire. You create yourself from a point. You define your own existence. A soul defines itself. What words cannot define, they can characterize, so that the truth may be recognized as it is encountered. The existence of a soul is absolute, at...

“A story is as good a way to organize your thoughts as anything else,” she points out, poised in the shadows in the doorway. I quickly conclude that she is playing the part of my conscience. That, or devil’s advocate. Either way, she’s me. I cannot say she does not really exist without implying the same of myself. She...

Who am I? Why am I here? What is the point of my existence? These are questions we all ask at some point in our lives, and we can go our entire lives without knowing the answer. I suspect that a lot of people try to avoid thinking about it, not knowing how to begin answering, and I wonder how long a person can go...

I do not often get comments on my blog; if I exclude the pingbacks, spam and my own replies, I’ve received twenty-two comments from ten different individuals since I started the eye of paradox two years ago. Four of those people have identified themselves as transgendered, and like every transgendered person I’ve...

A number of my posts, particularly the ones dealing with transgender issues in my life, have been written on a long, dark night of the soul. It can be difficult to come back and read what I’ve posted and resist the urge to delete what I’ve written, because of how dark they are. I have moments when I think, if ever a...

These days, it only takes a little curiosity, access to the Internet, and a bit of patience to find explanations of progressive spatial dimensions or examples of four dimensional geometry, such as the old favorite the hyper-square. Some of the things you will find use analogies like Flatland, or animations which is a...

On any given day, a small handful of people find their way to the eye of paradox. Some of them probably just glance at an article to see if it’s relevant to the search that brought them here. One or two might actually read something. Once in a blue moon, someone leaves a short comment. Taken all together, I do not see...

I have pointed out before that my struggle with gender dysphoria prompted me to search in all directions for a solution to being born in the wrong body, and the determination with which I pursued that goal in spite of all doubts and discouragements—even attempts to accept things the way they were, adapting to and...

I rarely have time to write or draw, and as my friend keeps reminding me, I’ve little hope making a living as an artist or writer. I have to agree, knowing that even brilliant writing and art takes a massive investment of time and effort up front. That seems to be a recurring theme in my life, however. I have never...

A person looking at my blog might get the impression that I do not get much writing done, and it is true that there are a lot of things in my life that get in the way of me writing most of the things I want to. The inside dope is that much of what I do write, I am not sure I want to share. Does anyone not afflicted...

The best representation of a thing is the thing itself and yet there are things that we experience great difficulty recognizing in their true form. The truth is one of those things. In speaking of the truth, what we have is a word—and as a representation of a thing, a word provides a label for a concept that is...

The response I received to my last post, Conundrum, prompted me to check out the recent posts of the people who commented or posted blogs in the transgender category yesterday. As a result, I became aware of the outcry against the appointment of Dr. Kenneth Zucker, Dr. Ray Blanchard, and J. Michael Bailey, by the...

Today I find myself puzzling over the weird fact of my existence. The Internet created an opportunity to show a side of myself that I had long kept hidden. I am, at least in the terms used by the medical community (and by extension, the LGBTQ community), transgendered; in spite of being born and raised male the core of...

I am back in school, freshly enrolled in the University of Phoenix in pursuit of a Bachelor’s Degree in Information Technology—Visual Communications. I do not have a great deal of time outside of work to devote to this, so I was naturally put out when the site went down in the middle of a post. Not just any post, but a...

“Detailing the dynamics of point paradox has never been easy, but the founding principle is prime awareness, the awareness of one, all and none" she elaborated, settling lightly on the arm of the couch. “Point paradox is initially a question of absolutes. An absolute can be represented with a value of ‘one’, ‘zero’ and...

“A soul is absolute and absolutes are autonomous,” she asserted firmly. “A mind is paradoxical, acting as an inclusive, exclusive and occlusive interface between absolutes, abstractions and manifestations. A mind, with the absolute of a soul as its foundation, is the focus of existence, whether real, surreal or ideal....

There is more to this, to existing, than meets the eye. It is its own prerequisite and it hurts think about why or how. The only thing that hurts more is trying to make sense not existing. But, given our circumstances, we can’t really afford to take it for granted. By a certain age, we know that death awaits, but what...